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How I Got My Love for the Open Road, and the Nice Man Who Invented the phrase, Fuck Off

11/1/2012

10 Comments

 
PicturePatrick Gough, 1926-2012
My dad, Patrick Gough, died in August. I wrote this Lives Lived about him in yesterday's Globe and Mail.

Patrick Gough         
Geography professor, baseball lover, birdwatcher, hitchhiker, inventor of world’s most infamous expletive, grandfather. Born June 20, 1926, in Toronto. Died in Guelph, August 2, 2012, of a stroke, age 86.
************** 
Patrick Gough stayed on daylight savings time all year, preferring not to change the clocks in the fall. “Why lose all that sunlight?” he’d say. He also loved espousing on his theory that everything affects everything. When he was 12, he was walking home from school one day when he was struck for the first time with the dreaded realization that one day he’d die. Struggling to make this inevitability more agreeable (he was an atheist) he realized that perhaps part of a person can go on after death. “If you’re always nice to people, that kindness will keep affecting others and live forever.”

From early on he loved baseball, playing the game with friends and knowing the game intimately. Anyone could ask him a random baseball question, such as, “Who played third base for Boston in 1949?” He’d always know. A star athlete at Runnymede Collegiate in track, basketball and football, Pat also once won the Toronto District Mile.

Patrick believed he invented the world's most widely-used expletive, or at least was responsible for combining its four-letter word with 'off'.

In 1942 at age 16, Pat had a summer job at the Toronto docks alongside tough older men who’d tease Pat for never swearing. He decided to do something about it. One night he turned all the swear words he knew over in his head. Finally the perfect phrase struck him. When he tried the expression out on the dockworkers the next morning, their jaws dropped. A year later he began hearing the expression around Toronto. Recently, an etymologist friend confirmed that the phrase started coming into usage in 1943, making Pat’s story stand. Ironically, I never heard Pat use the phrase except in telling this story. He was too nice for that.

Pat was a lover of maps and any road leading somewhere new. He spent years travelling abroad in the 50s, hitchhiking around North America, and canoe tripping in northern Ontario. Not surprisingly, after teaching high school math for six years, he decided to teach geography. He did graduate work in Madison, taught at Kent State, then at the University of Guelph until retirement. He was known to his students as the “Jimmy Stewart professor”. He looked like Jimmy Stewart and had the actor’s drawn-out friendly delivery.  

While teaching high school in Fort Frances, Pat met teacher Tena Kettles, a Manitoba farm girl with a lively sense of humor and keen intelligence. They married in 1959 and had two daughters, Linda and Laurie.

At age 58, Pat developed a heart condition and was told he had a year to live. He retired early and lived each day thrilled to be alive. He went on to live another 28 years, travelling, reading, writing, and outliving the doctor who’d given him the prognosis.

As for his childhood theory on kindness, he held onto that belief all his life. He was the nicest guy I ever knew.


Picture
Patrick Gough and my son Quinn
10 Comments
Judy Rothe
11/2/2012 12:06:45 am

The blog about your dad is great, Laurie. How is your mom doing? I have been remiss in not getting in touch with her. We did send a card at the time, but haven't followed up. Are any of you coming down to Colorado anytime soon? I know you loved Nederland when you were here a couple of years ago. We would love to see you.
Judy

Reply
steve johnson
11/2/2012 01:56:46 am

the invention of the expletive is a somewhat outrageous claim, but i can assure you this guy never lied in his adult life.

Reply
Sandra Keane
11/2/2012 02:19:20 am

Laurie, I remember your dad. He was my favourite professor, always so nice to us and so knowledgable, and YES, he totally looked like Jimmy Stewart. But he never told us he'd invented f...off! I love it!

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James B.
11/2/2012 02:20:57 am

Well now I know where to attribute my favorite stress-releasing phrase. thanx!

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Kelly Watt
11/2/2012 02:22:13 am

Laurie, okay, now i see where you got your love of travel! And hitchhiking! I love your books, laurie. Be well.

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Anita Kertzwizer
11/2/2012 02:23:26 am

Yep, seems you come by travelling and exploring the world honestly. When is your next book coming out?

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Sam Whiteside
11/4/2012 01:31:30 am

This makes sense to me. I know that nobody was saying this before the second world war because my linguistics prof was really into this stuff. The expression had to come from somewhere. Thanks for sharing Laurie!

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rob kaufman
11/4/2012 05:18:43 am

Well told love note. He was terrific in class for the brief period he taught me and so approachable outside. Thanks

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Jane Kempe
11/6/2012 09:42:29 am

Laurie, I can tell you loved your Dad very much. Thanks for sharing such a heart warming story, and his kindness will affect others and go on forever. xoxo

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learn more link
7/22/2013 10:08:18 pm

Oh my God! Those pictures were amazing . I have finally decided to start my traveling next week at the age of forty five. I hope it's never too late to do what you love. I always had to postpone my previous plans.

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    Laurie Gough

    I'm an author of books about my travels, a freelance writer, an adventurer, a mother of a little boy, an environmental activist, and someone who daydreams about finding the perfect place to live.

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